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This week was an epic week for Asshole Fuckfacery. So much so that I actually became enraged when I wrote this. Seriously. What horrible, horrible people. The last one is particularly horrible. So, put on your favorite OshKosh B’Gosh overalls and get ready for the filth. This is going to be ugly.

First up, some Oregon Asshole Fuckfacery.

It seems a week doesn抰 go by where I don抰 point out some Oregon racism. Wait. What Yes, some Asshole Fuckface racist in Oregon made himself known by hanging an effigy of Barack Obama on George Fox University.

A custodial crew at the 3,355-student Christian university found the Obama likeness hanging by fishing wire from a tree at 7 a.m. Tuesday and tore it down before students arrived for classes.

A sign taped to the cutout said, “Act Six reject,” referring to a scholarship program for Portland students, many of whom are minorities.

Naturally, the Christians were quite upset.

“We absolutely cannot hate those around us and say we love God,” he said. “It is not possible./p>

Um. Have you talked to any of your fellow Christians lately The ones in the south have a big hard on for torture.

At George Fox, Baker said he didn’t know how to interpret the political connection to Obama. “We just thought it was a student making a comment about our efforts to recruit.”

Oh, Jesus. Have you not noticed Obama is black It抯 not political. They just picked the country抯 #1 black guy. How na飗e are you guys up there

The campus has a Republican student group but not an organized group of campus Democrats.

Hey, there抯 a surprise. Keep on supporting those Christian values of war, torture, less civil rights, global warming, lying and cronyism.

Next up, PETA. Need I say more

Holy shit, the people involved in PETA take Asshole Fuckfacery to a new level. Do you like ice cream Would you like all ice cream to be made from ladies breast milk PETA would.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry’s Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow’s milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman.

“PETA’s request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow’s milk in the food he serves,” the statement says.

PETA, I抎 like to introduce you to logistics. I抎 also like to introduce you to creepy, although, I think you guys have already met.

PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health.

Yeah. Now close your eyes and picture a herd of women in a barn being milked by a farmer.

In a statement Ben and Jerry’s said, “We applaud PETA’s novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother’s milk is best used for her child.”

Wow, you guys are douchebags. And you should start making ice cream out of babies.

Next up, some amazing right wing Asshole Fuckfacery.

Who to blame for the current economic crisis The rich oligarchs who recklessly fed off the poor in a shockingly shortsighted and heinous manner Or brown people If you抮e an Asshole Fuckface, you gotta go with brown people.

The National Review抯 Asshole Fuckface extraordinaire, Mark Krikorian, wrote a delightful piece called 揅ause and Effect.In it, he lay the blame where it belongs: With Hispanics.

Washington Mutual, Inc. (NYSE:WM), one of the nation抯 leading banks for consumers and small businesses, has once again been recognized as a top employer by Hispanic Business magazine and the Human Rights Campaign.

Hispanic Business magazine recently ranked WaMu sixth in its annual Diversity Elite list, which names the top 60 companies for Hispanics. The company was honored specifically for its efforts to recruit Hispanic employees, reach out to Hispanic consumers and support Hispanic communities and organizations.

That抯 the 揅ausepart. The 揈ffectpart Well, obviously if you hire Mexicans and other Mexican like people, your entire bank will fail. Duh. That抯 why there are no banks south of the US border. It抯 just guys with wads of cash on street corners.

But why stop with blaming Hispanics when there are tons of black people running around

Discussing the decision by the U.S. Treasury Department and the Federal Housing Finance Agency to place Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac into conservatorship, Cavuto asked Rep. Xavier Becerra (D-CA) on September 18, “[W]hen you and many of your colleagues were pushing for more minority lending and more expanded lending to folks who heretofore couldn’t get mortgages, when you were pushing homeownership … Are you totally without culpability here Are you totally blameless Are you totally irresponsible of anything that happened”

Cavuto later said, “I’m just saying, I don’t remember a clarion call that said, ‘Fannie and Freddie are a disaster. Loaning to minorities and risky folks is a disaster.’”

We really need to stop pretending like Negroes are capable of owning stuff, right, Neil That your point, you horrible Asshole Fuckface Minorities are to blame for the bank抯 reckless loaning decisions

Finally, the epic Asshole Fuckfacery of John McCain.

John McCain is an amazing idiot. His actions this week define reckless and he has shown he should not be allowed anywhere near the white house even as a gardener. To sum up what happened:

The Senate Democrats, Senate Republicans, House Democrats, and Treasury Secretary Paulson spent all week negotiating over a bill to solve the current crisis. On Thursday morning, Senate Democrats and Senate Republicans announced that they had agreed on key points. Then McCain decided he wanted in. He asked President Bush to call a meeting with Obama. Obama did not see the need for it, but attended anyway. The meeting accomplished nothing. Oh, wait, that抯 wrong. The meeting destroyed 7 days of careful negotiation. He had no plan. He did not come with better ideas. He just wanted to stop what was happening, so he would appear relevant.

Boehner and McCain discussed the bailout plan, but Republican leadership aides described the conversation as somewhat surreal. Neither man was familiar with the details of the proposal being pressed by House conservatives, and up to the moment they departed for the White House yesterday afternoon, neither had seen any description beyond news reports.

At 1:25 p.m., McCain left Boehner抯 office through a back door, walking across the Capitol抯 rotunda to the applause of tourists. Graham conceded the group knew little about the plan the nominee had come to Washington to try to shape.

The White House meeting was a complete and total disaster.

The talks broke up in angry recriminations, according to accounts provided by a participant and others who were briefed on the session, and were followed by dueling news conferences and interviews rife with partisan finger-pointing.

McCain did not ask questions during the meeting, he did not do anything, but mumble some bullshit at the end.

Multiple sources said McCain didn’t say much. Two Democratic leadership aides said he didn’t speak until 43 minutes into the meeting.

And when he finally did単obbly goo.

“The insertion of presidential politics has not been helpful, it has been harmful,” said the Nevada Democrat. “A few days ago I called on Sen. McCain to make a stand, to let us know where he stands on the issue, but all he has done is stand in front of the cameras…”

“We had [Republican] Senator [Bob] Bennett, a high ranking official, who said these are the principles,” Reid said of the early potential compromise on the $700 billion package. “And then, guess who came to town And it all fell apart.”

The Senator is so disliked by his fellow Senators that he had to join with a group of House Republican fanatics. And make no mistake about it, John McCain has hitched his wagon to complete and total lunatics.

They want less regulation and tax cuts. You know, like curing an alcoholic by giving him a case of Glenlivit. They are insane ideologues who threaten our way of life because of their own self interest.

At the end of the day, there’s a lot of people thinking about how to rebuild this party,” said strategist Ed Rollins on CNN, “and do we want to rebuild it with John McCain, who’s always kind of questionable on the basic facts of fiscal control, all the rest of it, immigration. And I think to a certain extent this 110, 115 members of this study group are saying, here’s the time to draw the line in the sand.”

“That’s pretty scary stuff that they’re thinking about party right now and not country, is that what you’re saying” responded host Anderson Cooper.

“I think they’re, yes, they’re thinking about themselves,” said Rollins. “I think they don’t think that the threat is as great as a lot of other people do.”

You know the parents you read about every once in a while, who wouldn抰 let their child see a doctor because they believe in prayer and the child died That抯 what we are talking about when we discuss the people McCain has attached himself to during this financial crisis.

According to one GOP lawmaker, some House Republicans are saying privately that they抎 rather 搇et the markets crashthan sign on to a massive bailout.

揊or the sake of the altar of the free market system, do you accept a Great Depressionthe member asked.

No, actually, I don’t.

McCain just jumped to the #1 Asshole Fuckface of all time.

Did you know that a significant portion of our energy consumption is wasted by people leaving their chargers plugged into an outlet when they are not in use Unplug that shit when you’re not using it, you Asshole Fuckface.

FearTheReaper is a writer, actor and stand up comedian. Check back each Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday for more from FearTheReaper and read his blog, Stop All Monsters.